PuGs and Hearts

I don't know why I'm so sensitive to criticism. But I am. When people comment or compliment, I get red in the face and nervous. When they say they want to tell me something without wanting to sound mean, even a pug whose company I appreciate, I wonder what could be so bad. What could I have done?

It's not always about me. It's also about them. And usually, I'm very cruel to pugs because they mean so little to me. If someone doesn't listen the first few times I say don't stand in the fire, I stop trying to heal them. It usually words. Once they die a few times, they don't stand in the fire. So that's how I've learned how to treat them. But today, something new happened.

I was working on Ally Shade and found a tank from my server who was amusing enough to be around. We'll talk later, not sure about her yet. And this couple, a warlock and a paladin who were a couple. Which I thought was cute. It reminded me of myself and my boyfriend, when we play. The four of us ran a couple of dungeons and did more than a few fights without a healer (those like to ditch for some reason) until the tank had to go.

The three of us DPS sat in queue for a time before the warlock silently volunteered to her fiance to get on a healer for a faster queue. Not knowing what was up, I suggested to him, once she was gone, that I could get his BattleTag for a moment, and we could regroup. It worked, of course, I even got to float around on their PvP phase for a bit in my search for my Alliance's Loque'nahak. I then got a whisper from the woman. Apparently this wasn't such the case. What she said to me, though disturbing in nature, didn't make me upset. She even confessed to feeling bad for it and inviting me to stay with her, but I'd rather not become some nagging whisper in the back of her mind. Games of jealousy and betrayal had been played before, and I am all too familiar with these games.

I've been cheated on before. I've been emotionally and mentally abused. It's a wonder to me when I come across other sentient beings in PuGs, not because I intentionally forget that they're people, but because most of them have no personality, or such a negative one, that I choose to forget that they're no more than pixils. It reminded me of myself and the things I've been through, those moments where I've freaked out on my poor boyfriend for things that weren't his fault. I couldn't even take a harmless white lie from him without losing composure. I felt sorry for her and I wish her and her fiance the best of luck.

Also, as of this post, some nice level 77 hunter got herself a Loque'nahak 2 hours ago. :3 Congrats to her, I'll check again tomorrow.